A short diagnosis of my worries.

I've been lately beset by interleaved bouts of melancholy and glee. It keeps puzzling me that my mood has become so fickle on a regular basis. I guess I've overdone my act of keeping myself busy, so much so that the mind rejects what the heart wants to do. No doubt, I have the disquiet in my mind that I need silence, lest it lead way to anguish. I really liked the idea of "pensieves", of which JK Rowling talks about in her books of Harry Potter - an apparatus to separate out and study your thoughts as if in a microscope. It might not be fun, but I think it would help me uncover my own nature and mindset. To observe your thoughts as organisms which lend their influence on my pysche - a stepstone to a logical and rational life with unwarranted worries? Since I don't have these fantastic pensieves at my disposal, I guess I have to do with this digital one-dimensional text. Of late I have been doing a lot of strange things, such that I sometimes feel are not of my own will or those that I do for want of seeking solace in the unexplored paths of life.

1. I shall be teaching classes at a MBA coaching institute beginning this weekend.
2. Will be involved the NGO interaction committee of my company.
3. I keep planning to finish a book a week, and have a backlog of around 4-5 weeks!
4. Have to finish of my own office work too, lest my manager think less of me.
5. Some personal growth - what about the languages I have to learn? (I flunked the Japanese test, need to retake it this Nov. And, I might take up French classes starting this month)
6. I keep missing my home and family too much. (I guess I had enough of Bangalore)
7. Have to send my apps to the schools, the deadlines keep looming as they come closer, and I start to procastinate - a habit I dislike in others and abhor in myself, but sooner or later it catches hold of me.
8. What of the algorithms, that I had planned to practice?

This is what afflicts me, my mind, my thoughts. I hope I have written everything of it down. A doctor could say this is my diagnosis. But what is the cure? Oh wait, there is something else too, that is not in the list. Something that is missing, something that I don't know myself. I'm not able to exactly put a finger to it. But it is there nagging my mind, poking at me. What is it? I can't say. The cure ? - hmm... maybe it is to just lead my life and take everything in my stride. Maybe.